the ability to commit: from micro to macro

Writing about life in general? It’s kind of tough. I’m not sure why. I mean… when I was writing about writing, finding a topic was never an issue. Sometimes I was too tired to post an entry or maybe I was just preoccupied with something else, but I was never at a loss when it came to content. Material was plentiful. I had an inventory of ideas and when none of those appealed to me, I would just think of a new one.

I forget. Why did I even change the theme of this blog to begin with? Ah. Yes. There lies the problem. I didn’t really have a reason. I hadn’t written in a while. I wanted to return to blogging but I thought maybe I needed a change of scenery. A new subject perhaps? I changed because I was tired of the old — bring in the new.

When used sparingly, “bringing in the new” is not usually a problem. For a person like myself who “brings in the new” as a way of running away from the old, it’s definitely a problem. When a person becomes tired of something, they should, only naturally, put it aside. But if that behavior mirrors something much bigger (and much more destructive), then it shouldn’t be encouraged. So I did with this blog what I usually do in general — get bored, start fresh, and leave behind a pile of incomplete work.

Although blogging is just one of these micro-matters in my life, I’d still like it to reflect some of my self-improvement. I want to show, even if I’m just showing myself, an ability to commit. That is to say, I don’t want to quit blogging. Start with blog commitment and move forward into life commitment. Baby steps.

Sticking with the old, even if it is wrinkly and starting to creak, will grant me the opportunity to embrace stability and normalcy. Normal, stable people stay in the same house for decades, sometimes even generations. Normal, stable people keep employment within the same company for years. At this point, that kind of makes me cringe. But hopefully, in due time, I’ll have a different perspective on these things. For my own sake.

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